


Everlasting End

by Ashida



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Immortality, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-28
Updated: 2016-12-28
Packaged: 2018-09-12 15:18:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9078427
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ashida/pseuds/Ashida
Summary: There was nothing about Katsuki Yuuri that was fair, Victor had long since decided.He might have just decided that the first time they truly interacted, that night at the Grand Prix Final banquet, full of fleeting intentions that were over in the blink of an eye, this familiarity Yuuri had with him that made it seem like Victor had known him forever.And that was impossible, because everyone Victor had ever known were nothing but memories on the wind, and Yuuri would be all too soon as well.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Grinner_H](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grinner_H/gifts).



> I really need to learn how to write summaries, haha. This is just my crazy head canon about why we haven't seen any of Victor's back story.

There was nothing about Katsuki Yuuri that was fair, Victor had long since decided. 

He might have just decided that the first time they truly interacted, that night at the Grand Prix Final banquet, full of fleeting intentions that were over in the blink of an eye, this familiarity Yuuri had with him that made it seem like Victor had known him _forever_. 

And that was impossible, because everyone Victor had ever known were nothing but memories on the wind, and Yuuri would be all too soon as well.

* * *

It wasn’t _fair_ that Victor got so wrapped up in a person like this, because he’d always remember the first time he saw Katsuki Yuuri skate _his_ routine on the tiny screen of his phone in the eternal silence of his apartment, he felt the empty cavity of his chest echo like it finally knew what it was like to be alive, like maybe there was a heart there after all, and each thumping beat mattered because any second now this silent skate would end and every mere moment was precious in a way that they’d never been before. 

He should have known then, that taking off to Japan to meet this figure skater who conjured music from ice and silence was a mistake. 

* * *

The first time he saw Yuuri on Ice alone after searching the whole of Hasetsu for him, Victor’s chest echoed again, because Yuuri moved across the frozen surface like time had no beginning and no end, like the only thing he knew was the cold hard truth beneath his feet, there was only the dull hiss of his skates and the steam of his breath, wistful, graceful, beautiful, and it was the first time Victor thought that if lonely were a person, Yuuri would be it. 

And Victor had never been so distraught before, so anguished for someone else because it was an outrage that a life so short should know something that should only belong to eternity. It wasn’t fair, because Victor couldn’t _understand_ how a human could be so like him, and yet nothing like him at all in the thing that mattered the most.

* * *

Sometimes, Victor was convinced that Yuuri knew it all, knew that Victor could make himself _look_ young for a few years before he stopped ageing again, knew that Victor had to disappear before people began to notice that he wasn’t getting any older than his supposed 27years.

Victor was also convinced Yuuri knew exactly what Victor wanted even though it was something that he himself couldn’t ever give. 

It was the way he indulged Victor’s every craving for humanity as they got to know each other, as Victor found himself setting himself up to be ruined like never before, and there was something about Katsuki Yuuri that made Victor not want to help himself anymore. 

And he didn’t, he let himself be led by the human with a smile that put the stars to shame, with a determination that could make even a mountain fall to its knees, with a devotion to him, Victor, that was something he hadn’t ever been given before. 

The way he was welcomed into the family like he belonged, cherished like he was their own flesh and blood because it was like Yuuri _knew_ he didn’t have any of his own, he never asked after his family like so many before had, never gave him the inevitable curse of pity and sorrow that came when Victor said they were no more. 

He was grateful not to have to lie to Yuuri about this, grateful to keep his fake answers to himself about how long they’d been gone, because they’d been gone for a literal _age_ , a concept of time no mortal could comprehend. 

It was the way he first hugged Victor like it was something he’d been waiting the _longest_ time for, when it was Victor who’d been waiting too long to find someone who embraced him like this, like any moment Victor might disappear when the ugly reality was that it was always the other way around. 

It was the way Yuuri hugged him like that still, even after it was clear that Victor had condemned himself and said that he was here to stay, he’d stay long after Yuuri was gone and conjure the feel of Yuuri’s heat beating strong enough for two against his own hollow chest. 

That heartbeat Victor had become steadily obsessed with, in love with like it was a being of its own, and Yuuri seemed to know all about that too, he’d adorably taken Victor’s trembling hand and brought it to his chest after their first kiss so that Victor could feel how fast it was racing, how _alive_ he was with happiness because he couldn’t believe this was happening, Victor couldn’t believe it either. 

Now, he’d spoil Victor with his always shy kisses and guide Victor’s palm to the muscled plane of his chest so Victor could get lost in the feeling of something he didn’t ever want to forget, he’d let Victor memorise the rhythm of when he was excited as they shared kisses in a place where anyone might see, the way his heart skipped a beat when he was panicked or flustered when people did find them, or the way it was so _steady_ now that Yuuri finally found himself comfortable in Victor’s company enough to hold his hand for the world to see. 

Yuuri was full of constant surprises that Victor felt were all for him, wanting to do well for Victor’s sake instead of his own, he’d never known a human this utterly selfless, he’d plead for Victor to just be himself when that was the only thing he couldn’t be for Yuuri. The guilt would have eaten him alive if it could, Victor would like to see it try.

Victor marvelled, because Yuuri could be so confident for one mere moment of time, and then so crippled with anxiety the next, and those anxious moments pained him; they felt like eternity all on their own, Victor always wanted to make them go faster for Yuuri’s sake, even though it would mean _he_ lost time, which was fast becoming more precious to him than he ever thought it would. 

Yuuri was _so young_ , yet at the same time he was the oldest soul Victor had ever met, and that feeling of familiarity would rear its ugly head and give him hope, something Victor thought he’d discarded long ago.

* * *

It was the way Yuuri smiled at him in the mornings from the pillow next to his like he still couldn’t believe he could be so lucky, the way his eyes flickered awake before his lips curved and his cheeks bloomed into this blush that would have stopped Victor’s heart if he had one, the first thing Yuuri would say every morning was Victor’s name, and Victor knew it was him that was truly lucky. 

Yuuri was so unconsciously good at landing cheap shots that made Victor almost regret this, how he’d wind Victor up to the point of madness as they tangled themselves hopelessly in the soft sheets of Victor’s bed that’d never slept two until now, because before he’d never brought anyone back to this apartment, and yet Yuuri had _moved in_ , he’d walked right in like _he_ belonged, and Victor knew once Yuuri was gone this place would never be the same.

The worst times were in bed, when Victor would let his greed overcome his last resistance and he’d drown himself in Yuuri’s soft skin, he’d kiss his name from Yuuri’s lips as Yuuri arched his back up into Victor’s body like Yuuri needed to be closer still. And Victor _never_ knew what to do, always so torn between brushing that bed messed hair away from Yuuri’s face as he lay in the pillows so Victor could see the desperation in his eyes, or did he set himself to Yuuri’s skin and leave marks that would soon fade like a mockery of his existence. 

And Victor could _swear_ that Yuuri knew then, because Yuuri would kiss him, kiss the turmoil from Victor’s conscious and show him the way, he’d wrap his legs around Victor’s waist and whisper what he wanted Victor to do him, and this at least Victor could indulge him with, gladly. 

So he’d fuck Yuuri into the mattress and fulfil Yuuri’s every want, even when Yuuri clutched at him and begged _’don’t ever stop.’_ like it wasn’t a knife in the gut, it was the _most_ unfair Yuuri ever was when he said that, because did he know how long forever really was? How Victor would like nothing more than to give him exactly what he wanted?

It was when it was the other way around, when Yuuri devoted himself to Victor’s every whim like he wasn’t spoilt enough, how Yuuri would leave his marks that Victor wished would last forever in memory of this mind blowing thing they shared. It was how Yuuri would draw it out for as long as he could for Victor’s sake, tease Victor’s body with his mouth and smile like he was something innocent when he was so far from it that Victor actually laughed. Yuuri would drive Victor _insane_ to the point where Victor didn’t care about time anymore and he just wanted Yuuri to hurry up and stop teasing, to hurry up and fuck him so he was the one who could come undone and know exactly how Yuuri felt when he said ‘don’t ever stop,’ because he’d find himself saying that same thing over and over again as Yuuri took him from behind to reach places that no one had ever touched before.

Yuuri would always be embarrassed after that, because he’d get _so rough_ , so hungry with his own want as he gripped Victor’s ass and snapped his hips forward just the way Victor liked it, that he’d always end up finishing first, and that was why he was always so shy to fuck Victor in the first place. It never stopped him from turning Victor around and using his mouth, and Victor never cared because Yuuri was so fucking good, so thorough as he took Victor all the way to the back of his throat, pushed his fingers in and curled them in the spot that had Victor _moaning_ with his hands buried in Yuuri’s soft hair.

Then he’d watch Yuuri fall asleep next to him with that feeling called hope in his chest, he’d forget that tomorrow would be one day closer to him being all alone again, he was determined to enjoy it while it lasted, to wake up early every morning so that he could hear his name on Yuuri’s lips because it might be the last time Yuuri said it.

* * *

It’d been nearly a year since he found Yuuri, and Victor still thought it wasn’t fair how he had everything he wanted in a person, had found everything except the one thing he needed. 

It was the day of his existence, a day that just happened to coincide with the happiest holiday the world knew, people spent this day with family and friends, they celebrated and gave each other gifts that people soon discarded over the course of time like they forgot how special it was to have family around to actually _give_ you something.

Victor would get flowers that soon died, he’d get sentiments on paper with chocolate and candy, he wouldn’t ever get anything that was permanent, he’d been resigned to this for hundreds of years.

Except this year he was in Hasetsu with Yuuri and his family that welcomed him like some long lost son who they’d loved forever, and Victor felt sick, sick because that feeling in his chest was stronger than it’d ever been, and he was so fucking stupid to hope.

They all gathered on Christmas morning, his birthday, and Victor was piled with gifts, a new robe that was lush and soft but not as soft as Yuri’s hair, and it would stay at Yu-topia and be there for him whenever he came _home_ with Yuuri. He got a framed photo of everyone together when he was first here with Yurio, a solid memory that Victor could keep forever until the ink faded, until the paper it was printed on disintegrated, until nothing would be left but the metal frame and the image in his head. 

He got socks and handkerchiefs, he got body wash and cologne and small things that only family gave one another, he got the blessed relief of no one asking after his family on a family holiday, like they _were_ his family now and that was the end of the story, and Victor thought that this might just make up for all the birthdays he’d had before now. 

Except Yuuri hadn’t given him anything yet, they’d agreed to exchange gifts alone on Yuuri’s insistence, so for the day Yuuri just sat back and watched as Victor drank with his family and smiled, he watched as Victor laughed in the midst of it all and found a place to belong even if it was only for a few short years. 

It was late before Victor knew it, time had this nasty way of going too fast in the moments that mattered, and too slow for everything else, so he relished every second with Yuuri as the sky turned purple and pink outside the window of Yuuri’s tiny childhood bedroom. 

The house was quiet now, and with it came the lonely reminder that this was how it’d always been for Victor before this. 

They sat cross legged on his single bed looking at each other and Yuuri did his thing, the thing where he knew exactly what to do when Victor needed it the most. If Victor had been observant enough, he’d have seen that there was only one gift that was meant for Yuuri, and that Yuuri didn’t have anything for him.

Except he was to busy getting caught up in this person all over again as Yuuri looked at him with eyes that Victor swore were as old and foolishly unwise as his because hope was for the foolish, as Yuuri took his hand with a coy smile and brought it to his chest, and Victor knew this time was different, because that heart was hammering like any second it just might stop and then it would be the worst birthday ever instead.

“I know, Victor.” Yuuri sighed and shut his eyes like he was the heartbroken one.

Victor couldn’t breathe, choked as he was on the ache in his chest, as desperate as he was for what he thought was happening right now to be real and not just another unfair thing Yuuri could to do him.

“How?” was all Victor could manage as he felt Yuuri’s heart thunder like it was reaching out to the hole in his chest.

Yuuri blushed then, faltered with his usual shyness before he continued on, his cheeks were blossoming with colour even though Yuuri had already confessed everything Victor could get out of him, or so he thought. “I’ve been your fan for the longest time, you know.” he looked away, unsure, and Victor couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“How long?” Victor heard his voice break, overflowing with desperation and the hope that was so overbearing that it hurt, so much that he was digging his fingers in to Yuuri’s chest to hold onto the feeling of that beating heart. “How long, Yuuri?” he urged again because now wasn’t the time for Yuuri to be cruel like this.

“Um… what would you say if I said forever?” and he asked like he didn’t know the answer, like it wouldn’t be the best thing Victor had _ever_ heard in his life, like Victor still might fade away at any second because it was something that maybe Yuuri was used to after all. 

And had Yuuri _known_ for all this time and kept silent because he thought Victor might leave him, because he thought Victor wouldn’t _want_ to spend forever with him?

“Are you serious right now, Yuuri?” Victor was shaking, clutching at Yuuri’s shoulders now, the tiny bedroom seemed to suffocate them both as Victor’s urgency drowned the room. 

“I wasn’t sure when to tell yo - oh! Victor, what are you doing?” Yuuri sputtered as Victor jumped his bones and pushed him back on that tiny bed with the creaky springs, Yuuri’s heart was doing that thing where the beats were uneven, where it raced and then skipped a step before it carried on its way, when Yuuri was anxious and excited all in one and Victor was the cause.

Victor couldn’t help himself now, the smile came to his face unbidden as he kissed all over Yuuri’s own, as he made Yuuri laugh and blush even more because Victor put his head down and listened to Yuuri’s crazy heart that wouldn’t ever stop. “How?” Victor asked again, and how he could hear the awe in his voice, the wonderment and the _relief_.

The hands in his hair were soothing, they twirled in the locks of his fringe and roughed his undercut as he lay against Yuuri’s chest, “The hot spring here is… special, only for my family though…” Yuuri trailed off as if he didn’t know what else to say, like he wasn’t sure if Victor wanted to even know.

Victor snapped his head up at that, “Does that mean… your parents, your sister?” and suddenly he knew what today had been about, knew why he’d always felt like he belonged here and always would, _’Welcome to the family.’_ the card from Yuuri’s mother had said. 

“Mhm, Happy Birthday I guess??” how Yuuri could say it like it was the lamest present ever, Victor didn’t know, so he kissed Yuuri his thanks, kissed him until Yuuri got the picture and laughed against his mouth, until he was kissing him with the finality would that stand the test of time.

And Katsuki Yuuri really wasn’t fair at all, to put Victor through all that, to have him agonising over something he’d thought was always out of reach, “Yuuri, are you telling me it’s been _this_ long, hundreds and hundreds of years for you to even approach me through all the different lives I’ve lived?” Victor deadpanned as the realisation hit him, “Why?”

All over again Yuuri blushed and stuttered, he twiddled his thumbs and turned his gaze to the window to look outside, “Just because we’re kinda the same, doesn’t mean you would have liked me.” he mumbled it under his breath because he knew how ridiculous he sounded, how much time he’d _wasted_ by being shy and not taking this one chance.

And if that wasn’t the cutest thing Victor had ever heard, then he just might not have ever forgiven Yuuri for it, “You’re so mean, Yuuri.” Victor feigned his hurt with a pout as the sun continued setting out the window.

“Alright, alright! I’ll make it up to you.” Yuuri laughed as he played along with Victor’s act. 

“Hmm, lucky you’ve got forever then.” Victor said as his chest was filled with something new.

And for once, forever might not be long enough. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading. 
> 
> Find me on tumblr! [here](http://captain-erwinmerica.tumblr.com)


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